Dear God, or anyone that can hear me.
I want to forgive him, I do. But what he did to me is just far to hard. I don’t think i will ever be able to forgive him. It feels like it would be sort of like trying to forgive someone after they have already killed you. He has taken my life away, i just hope I will be able to overcome this obstacle. It seems hard, because I don’t really believe in God. If God was real, why would he put me through this. It has truly traumatized me, and even 3 years later, I still cant get over it. It has been changing the way i see myself ever since it happened. I just wish that somehow i could forget about it, because I cant forgive him. The worst part? He’s my big brother. He’s supposed to be there for me.. isn’t he?
Andrea - Canada
June 12th, 2008 at 4:43 am
Hi Andrea,
Sorry to hear that your life has been quite unbearable. I have one question for you today. If you don’t believe in God then how do you know that it is God who is making your life miserable? It could be Satan who is making your life hell. My suggestion is try to approach God to help you and I guarantee you he will respond. He is not like us who take revenge for every little sin we commit. You have to change your perception. It is not God who should be blamed. I encourage you to ask God with all sincerity to grant you his mercy and blessing.
Cheers!!
M
June 12th, 2008 at 7:56 am
Dear Andrea,
God is not supposed to be a bad thing. God is only LOVE. That makes me think that if love is missing in your life, God is certainly missing then, not because he abbandoned you but probably because you’re not seeing “Him”, not recognizing the signs he gives you. Please, read the book “Conversations With God” (author Neale Donald Walsh), if you have a chance. The author presents a completely different way of thinking about what God is, if you compare with traditional religions. I don’t have a specific religion, but it helped me have my own. Why don’t you try? The only thing I can assure you (because I learned it) is that there are many ways of finding this “God” and you are the only one who can find “Him” your way.
Please, don’t miss the chance to do it! Cause if you think “He” is responsible for your suffering, it means you are far away from solving your problems.
Wish you all the best.
L.
June 13th, 2008 at 4:56 am
This is where God the Father is so important to know. Because “Daddy” is easy to run to. They are arms of justice too.
June 15th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
Dear Andrea,
I hear you. Forgiveness is not easy, and I imagine that it feels, in your case, impossible. Your brother has hurt you and you feel you can’t have a life again — but you can; you always can. Maybe you don’t have to forgive him, but you can let go of some of your anger for your own sake. No, it doesn’t change what has happened and your pain will still be your pain, and you will always remember how unfairly you have been treated; but for your own good, because you are worth it, it might be best to release some anger and move on.
You deserve to live a happy, fulfilling life. Don’t let your anger and sadness bog you down. Your past may have been horrible but your future can be beautiful.
It will be difficult, I am sure, but you can do it. I wish you all the best.
Love,
Jaelle
June 20th, 2008 at 4:07 pm
Andrea,
My understanding of God is that we go through the things that we go through because God loves us. God is sufficient. The things we endure in life can be his punishments, his gifts, his blessings. I don’t believe that we’re supposed to be able to quantify or understand God’s judgements, wills, punishments, etc. I simply have the understanding that God loves his children and he has a plan for you. I would ask that you pray for understanding. I understand you don’t believe in God. Just close your eyes, if you feel like it get on your knees (I do from time to time if I feel the need to), and just let it all out. Tell Him how you feel and how you need understanding. From there, you might just be silent and listen. Maybe you go about your days looking for that understanding.
I’m not here to tell you how God talks to me or anyone else, because I have probably missed his calling many times and I know that there have been times where I feel like I’ve deserved some of the things I’ve gone through. If I knew I’d always be there to hear him like I want to.
I’ll pray for you tonight Andrea that God would talk to you. I know that He’s there and I know that He’s listening. Just ask him to talk to you. I really believe that the peace of hearing him call you for the first time will be one of the most beautiful things you’ve ever heard. A sound that cannot be heard with just your ears. A sound that only fully resonates when it touches in your soul.
God bless and take care,
Burton
June 22nd, 2008 at 11:14 pm
Dear Andrea,
I am sorry for the pain you are suffering now. It’s a deep and constant reminder of Life’s cruelty, made so much worse by the betrayal of family.
I am so glad that you have prayer and belief to carry you through this awful time. Continue to confide in the Lord for the solace and relief you will find.
In the meantime, find someone you can trust. There are many reasons why this secret must lose its hold over your heart. You deserve to be happy and have carried this burden long enough. It’s a daunting prospect to face the moment of letting go and speaking the truth aloud, and the time afterwards will be even harder as your newfound freedom brings a host of new emotions. However you are a human being with the right to a future. The exploitation of personal dignity by another disrupts the natural order God created for man. It is a sin and a crime to violate nature and must learn the severity such actions bring.
Continue to pray, for strength and support, and break free when God tells you to. He loves you.
Nay
June 27th, 2008 at 12:55 am
Andrea,
It was not your fault. You have done nothing wrong… Time will help you go through. And God will help you with that! Wishing you all the best.
July 11th, 2008 at 4:55 am
Andrea,
Please note that whatever situation you’re going through is in God’s hands. He handles and heals all. In these 3 years since the occurance, have you not seen any change in yourself? Have you seeked professional help to cope? I’m not going to lie and say that I haven’t felt the same thing in the past. I’m sure a lot of people have felt the same way. Know that you’re not alone on that boat. What I do want you to know is that God is REAL. He’s here, he’s there, he’s everywhere. You posted this message June 11, 2008. God enabled you to do so.
Here’s a good website: http://web2.airmail.net/dpelc/yellow/. Click on the link and view what it has to offer. This may help you in the future in trying to let go of the anger you have festering towards God.
Everything that happens in our lives is a test. I feel it’s a test of faith. Some fail and some prevail. Which will you do?
Always remember: THIS TOO SHALL PASS.
August 10th, 2008 at 12:50 am
I think there is a lot of confusion about forgiveness in the Christian world. If God does not forgive until we repent, why are we beating ourselves up over forgiving someone who has not repented. Yes, we can try to walk away and let God deal with them. We can work towards a better relationship with that person, by asking for repentence, but we cannot be asked to forgive when God would not.
August 13th, 2008 at 9:23 pm
You only have to forgive youself. You can’t and you must not forgive him. You have to work inside yourself to be free. This is so difficult and it takes a long long time. God is for you whenever you decide to GO FOR HIM. But it’s impossible to go to Him 24 hours a day. Yes, there are people in our lives that hurt us so deeply that we feel we are dead. And generally these people are family members. I think that they hurt us so deeply because they are family. So………we can create our own heart family, with friends. And, if there is no friend around us………near us……………WE HAVE GOD. And perhaps you will have hugs from people that can pray with you through internet. There are so many good people in this planet. We must give these people more power in our lives …. so we can throw away far from us one or two or ten that can hurt us. My english is awful, my mother tong is español……………..CRUZA A LA VEREDA DE ENFRENTE. Don’t waste time in this monster…………cross the street and take other way. Life is so short………….days………….those are long.
August 18th, 2008 at 10:35 am
I am sure that no one knows what you are feeling, except that they have experienced the same thing….I, like many others want you to know that you are deeply loved regardless of what has happened to you in the past….How can anyone convince you of the love of God for you? What can anyone say to convince you that God is love? Your experience was awful, evil and devastating…..one who you trusted violated you on several levels….that was not the plan of God……that was not inspired by God….that was not the express will of God for you life……God is opposed to anything that brings death, defilement, distortion or devastation to anyone……all good and perfect gifts come from above…..your hurt didn’t come from above, it came from the evil mind of a wounded person…
The God that you don’t believe in inspired you to write your letter on this site….the God that you don’t believe in has now made it possible for millions of people to pray for “you”….the God that you don’t believe in has caused compassion for you to rise in the hearts of millions of people….because the God that you don’t believe in loves you………
From the beginning of time He knew that you would be violated by the work of the devil. So, He sent His son, Jesus to make a provision for you both before and after the violation……Jesus loves you more than you will ever know….and Jesus loves the one who violated you……If you receive the love that Jesus has for you, you will then be at peace and be able to receive your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual healing…..you will be free from the bondage of the past……you will be able to forgive and therefore forget how much it hurt…….Receive Jesus today as your personal Lord and Savior and watch Him change your heart and heal your hurt…….
Just pray this simple prayer, “Dear God, I can’t continue on my own. I need you. Please save me. Jesus come into my heart, be my Lord and Savior. Deliver me from the hurt, pain and anguish that have become such a regular part of my life…..I receive you know and according to Romans 10:9 & 10, I am now saved. I am a new creature in Christ Jesus…….Thank you Father for my change.”
If you have prayed this prayer, the angels in heaven are rejoicing just for you…..Please get a bible and begin to read in the Gospel of John…..there you will learn about Jesus and begin your new life in Christ….develop a relationship with the Lord…he will answer any question that you have and show you in His word what to do to live a victorious life……
With much love and more prayer, just for you……..
August 30th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
dear Andrea,
sometimes life is hard. sometimes people do awful things to one another. and sometimes it doesn’t seem like there is any god out there watching out for you. but if you look and listen, you will see what blessing god has given you. you may not have a great life at the moment, or a happy family, but have you read all the other comments and advice sent to you? even though you have never met them, these people are god’s blessing for you. they care so much that they are willing to search inside themselves for the love and advice to help you get through this.
you live in a house in a town in a country in a continent on an earth so big that you are like one stitch in the fabric of the world. surrounding you are the stitches of your family and friends, and even if they might not seem to care, there are people out there who do, more than you can possibly imagine. remember that on this earth, we who care are always looking out for the ones we love, and we want to help you to do that too.
though ships may sink
and planes may fail
we can cross oceans to reach each other
on the wings of love
love always,
stephanie
September 14th, 2008 at 7:16 pm
dude, ive been thru exact;y the same thing as u , i think if were talkign about the right things,…
its like , hes ur bro, hes meant to be there for u, and then he screws u over, well screws you, u know, and , im only 13, and it happenedd for 5 yrs of my life, …
here is a bible verse that i reckon will suit u best, wel here is two
Ask, and you shall recieve
Seek, and you shall find
Knock, and the door will be opened
for everyone who asks, recieves
everyone who seeks, finds\
and the door is opened to those who knock
Matthew 7:7-8
For i am convinced that neither angels nor demons, neither life nor death, neither the present nor the future or any powers neither height nor depth or anything in all creation can seperate us from the love of god
Romans 8:38 ( i think,)
these two verses helped me alot, think abotu them when ur alone, and what they truelly mean
September 22nd, 2008 at 2:55 pm
God isnt trying to punish you, your simply being tested, its a test of your strength, your faith and alot of other tthings, it will help you for the better, you may not even see it until a few years down the track.
stay strong, things will get better..everything happens for a reason!
Roberta
September 24th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
heyy
i have two friends that have both experienced similar things! although i havnt experienced it myself i know it would feel sooo good to tell someone close to u!!! my best friend told me about what happened with her cousin and ever since then life has gotten better for her.
Does your mum know? or a close friend?
it would be good to just let it all spill out to someone close to you that u trust to keep ur secret!!
I to sometimes question if god was real why would he make u go through all these awful things. but those who have been through harsh times always come out stronger and a better person. It teaches u what to do in hard situations and a better future is probably just around the corner.
I really hope u can get through this obstacle… remember u r not alone in the world!!! there are always others out there who will be going through similar situations.
stay strong, have faith and don’t turn your back on the world!!!
rhiannon
xoxo