Dear God,
Please give me wisdom about my job. My boss treats me like a dog. I have confronted her to no avail. Despite my ardent search for a better job I have no prospects. My wife and son depend on the income I provide, but I feel so depressed getting ready for work I have to muster all the will power I have just to shower and shave… The only option I see is to stick it out and look for another job in the meantime.
God, would you please provide for me a job that doesn’t eat away at my sanity? This one drains the life out of me so I can’t be there for my beautiful family when I get home. My wife and son deserve my energy when I’m with them! Or would you knock some sense and respect into my boss? She doesn’t seem to value human life other than her own. Or maybe would You give me the courage to stand up to her in a way that would get through? You’ve said that those who pray to You and trust in You will not be put to shame. I am praying and trusting, so help me work in a way that demands respect. Help me pace myself so that I have the best of myself to give my wife and son at the end of the day.
Provider, please provide what I need, whatever that is and help me recognize it when it comes.J - Phoenix, AZ, USA Share:
April 18th, 2008 at 12:20 am
I feel just the same way as you. I live in Brazil, i´m a journalist and my boss is the same as yours. I´m looking for a better job too, but i have no prospects yet.
I hope god can hear our mutual prayers!!
Good luck for you!
God bless us
April 18th, 2008 at 12:33 am
Dear J.
You seem like a very strong loving person and I am certain a solution is just around the corner…
Take a moment tonight to close your eyes, breathe deeply and begin to visualize your ideal job. Make a clear picture of what you want and need. Feel it. Breathe it. See it in your heart. See how happy you will be as you get dressed in the morning to go to work. Feel the joy of looking at your new paycheck. Feel yourself smiling at your wife and son on weekends as you go on FUN spontaneous adventures. Hear the laughter, feel the joy and the love. Keep these thoughts in your mind and heart constantly. Write it all down on a piece of paper and put that paper in your pocket. When your current boss treats you badly, just reach into your pocket, hold that paper in your hand and tell yourself that soon, you are going to be announcing that you have found a wonderful new job. Then, send a kind thought to your boss. She must be a very unhappy person but that negativity does not have to affect you. It’s not about you. Surprise her with a compliment every morning. Find something, anything. It will make you feel better and it just might make your job a little easier in the meantime!
I have been in a similar situation. I know how hard it can be. But once you change your thoughts about what is possible, magic happens. I’m sending bright beams of positive energy to you. Good luck!
April 18th, 2008 at 12:47 am
J,
I do not typically respond to these post… I am more of an observer of sorts. However; I do feel for the sentiments expressed in your post. I will simply focus on your story instead of inserting my own at this point, but I have been in a job that drained me of everything. It is made even more difficult when you are “stuck” in that job to make ends meet. My only solace when this happened to me was to realize I do not live to work… I work to live. It is a simple concept I know, but it is what I had to hold on to. I woke up every morning and went to work not because I wanted to work, but because I was creating a life outside of work that was worth the effort and without that job that life would not be possible.
By all means search for another opportunity. I just hope that if all else fails you can at least change your focus a bit. It is true we spend far to much of our lives at work, but that does not mean it should cause the rest of our lives to suffer.
April 18th, 2008 at 3:05 am
Hello,
I am sorry to hear that you have such a hard time at work. Your boss sounds like a nightmare. What I wonder is why does she hold such power over your life? Do you work in a position where there is litterally a line up of people waiting to replace you and she makes you aware of this painfully all the time? If this is the case, you must leave that job.
Is it at all possible that you’ve somehow given her power over you? Some people natually take advantage of everyone and everything. After reading your message, you sound like a “giver” and by the way you’ve described your boss, I see a “taker” there. A natural balance between givers and takers does not exist. The giver must find a way to limit the “draw” from the taker or have his “energy” consumed. (BTW- yes, I’ve read the Celistine Prophecy and yes, it’s a crock; but these analogies work nicely here.)
Anyway..
You probably don’t *need* her approval anyway. If you are truely valuable and you know this, who cares what she thinks? That’s what I meant by you’re giving her power over you. Find your own happiness in what you do. If you find happiness when others approve of you, then again, you need a new boss.
A headhunter is a great way to get a new job- they do all the looking for you.
I’m not really a religious person at all but I still like this site. If I were, I’d say “God helps those…. ” and “Maybe God is trying to tell you something by putting this horrible person in your face; maybe it’s intentional and the purpose is to make you think about things and then act”.
Finally, each day is precious. This person has no right to make you miserable, and also, you have no right to allow her to do this to you. Move on man.
Good luck!
April 18th, 2008 at 7:56 am
My friend,
There was a time when I felt exactly the way you do now. When I woke up in the morning, the first thing that came to my mind was: “Not again.”
It was very difficult to stand up and go… I was always hoping for something to happen so I wouldn’t need to go. Sometimes when I was in front of the building, I would walk around the block just to be free of it for some more minutes.
What I have to say to you is: be patient and faithful. The Lord set me free of the place I was then. Now I work in a place I really like and my incomes are much better. Keep looking for someplace else. You’ll find it.
“I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread. They are always generous and lend freely; their children will be blessed. ” - Psalms 37:25-26
April 18th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Right on brother. This is a tough situation. But you are doing the right thing…you will find that new job and you will evolve on. Hang tough.
April 18th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
Start your own home-based business my friend. It will make you dream again, and energy will be restored.
April 20th, 2008 at 3:17 am
J.
“My wife and son depend on the income I provide”…
Labour with honour, honesty, integrity and dignity.
Thank your boss for giving you the opportunity to learn patience. Rejoice every time she ‘treats you like a dog’ in that you are being trained in being ‘all you can be’. Rejoice that you are being strengthened as a man. Rejoice every morning when you shower and shave, eager to face another day of training in discipline and inner strength by your boss.
And remember, there is always someone far worse off than you…..so be thankful…
Consider me……For the last 26 years I have labored for my family to be and then my family when it arrived…I have had many bosses who were terrible as yours………..I have worked in some very difficult situations….I worked for 15 months in Saudi Arabia and was there at the start of the war……I was there when compounds were being blown up….I have worked in Phoenix and it is one of the better places to work, believe me. I would rather sweep the streets in phoenix than work in some places I have worked.
When my eldest son had cancer and I did not know if he would live or die I labored to pay the mountain of bills that came and I gave up my chance to see him during his chemo. I gave up my chance to see him for what we thought might be his last christmas….I was in Germany and he was in Australia. You have a son…..can you imagine what it would be like to go to work each day, on the other side of the planet, not knowing if you were ever going to see your boy alive again? I used to go to the mens room to cry, and then I would dry my eyes and go back to work. I did that for 6 months. I prayed many times every day that He would save my boy, and He did.
Those were tough days…..but I made it through because of the experiences I had in my past that made me a strong man one who can provide for his family even in the face of his son having cancer…………And you are being made strong by your boss…..
My reward fromy my wife and family for doing all I can these last 26 years to provide for them? My wife has attacked me in court in a way she has promised so many times she would not, my eldest daughter hates me and my youngest daughter is as greedy as her mother. My two boys are wonderful. My wife destroyed my family and will leave me penniless after 26 years of labor at the age of 44…..but….my son is alive……and that makes it all worthwhile! Every day, I count my blessings that He answered my prayer and spared my son.
So rejoice you are with your wife and son….rejoice you have your health…rejoice you have a job to go to….consider you may be being tempered and toughened for an experience that is yet to come…..and when it does, you will be a stronger and wiser man, ready to face the trials and tribulations that life throws at you.
God bless you and your family…I pray you get to stay with the the one woman you love all your life.
Peter
April 20th, 2008 at 10:17 am
Do you honestly think God allows 200,000 innocent ppl to die every day around the world through famine, disease, accidents, war, natural disasters etc, yet he his concerned about your job??? That’s just too funny. How about YOU get yourself a better job? How about YOU better educate yourself. How about YOU take some responsibility for your family’s lives!!!
April 20th, 2008 at 12:23 pm
Sometimes we are sent a challenge which will make us grow as people. To learn to love ourselves a little more and to learn to accept those around us without judgement. I would suggest that your boss has a great deal of trouble loving herself and her actions are a facade that she must play out each and every day. This does not mean that you should accept her treatment of you. It simply is what it is. My sense is that you are in this job to learn something from her and once that has been done you will be able to move on to something better. In other words, ask God and your Guides to show you what you need to learn so that you can accept this healing and then move on with your life. As was suggested in another repsonse, imagine the job you want, but first you must accept that each challenge in life has something to teach us - it doesn’t have to hard, and once you accept this, it wont be.
Good luck x
April 30th, 2008 at 3:49 am
J-
I don’t think you should concern yourself with comments from readers like PING. I think it is honorable to seek a better job- it’s something that you spend so much time at, and it can build up and take a toll on all of your relationships, even with the Lord our God! He has a reason, it’s such an easy thought to go by, but much harder to put into practice or belief. Later on, when you are more patient with your loved ones, or at a different job, you will see what the Lord wanted you to take from this position. His grace is sufficient, and he would NEVER give you anything he knew you couldn’t handle. Maybe you should make a conscious effort to praise him in the bad moments- praise him in the good moments too!!! I hope things get better! It’s a blessing to be able to relate to you- I feel the same about my job. God Bless!!
April 30th, 2008 at 11:51 am
“No man is your friend, no man is your enemy. Every man is your teacher”. Learn, hung on, keep looking and always keep the faith. Send her light and be happy with your family. Don’t hate her, accept, be strong and soon, soon, you will find a better job. She is not happy, dont let her make you the same way. Good luck my friend
April 30th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
J,
Three pieces of advise:
1. Don’t take it personal… try to see things without adding emotions or feelings… describe things just as they are… consider about setting clear limits to her… she seems to be a very unhappy person and probably feels jealous about your happiness. After, state deeply that you deserve the best in life.
2. In a religious way, try deep praying and read about Saint Eduwiges… pray and leave the response to her (has been a real, effective and fast help in moments like this in my life… do it even if you are not Catholic)
3. In a very practical way, try posting your resume in serious head hunters like Korn Ferry International, Heidrick & Strugles, Boyden, Spencer Stuart, Egon Zehnder… they will help you.
God bless you and your family,
Carlos
May 10th, 2008 at 5:01 am
HKAY has seen god’s testicles? Why refer to god as a He? What if it is a she? Pretty degrading to call her a He…..
The fact is that responses will come from being creative, if there is a god, he or she would want you to try something new and stop spiraling downward.
While you are looking for a new job, try to suck up to your boss and change her perception of you. Tell her that she looks nice, compliment her shoes, get the other people in your office to go in on a birthday gift.
If that doesn’t work, complain to HR that her attitude is not condusive to productivity, and that she needs to go.
It’s the workers that matter, not the boss, don’t forget that!
May 17th, 2008 at 8:32 pm
you seem to represtent my exact reasons for my fear that i will inevitably grow up. keeping in mind this i not a knock at you as a person. but us as a soiecty. i dont know if there is a greater purpose to life or not. i think not mostly. yet i cant fathem spending all my life in 9 till 5 job never trying for more or seeing the world.
whether i will eventually give in or not i dont know yet.
i try my hardest to do what makes me happy.. with carefull consideration for those it may affect.
please try for me if you will to show that something more is possible.. have fun always.. make your job brighter and funer even.
dance and sing and love always. laugh and smile and smite your bitch of a boss.
enjoy the little things..
July 1st, 2008 at 2:47 pm
[…] … response to her has been a real, effective and fast help in moments like this in my life …http://www.dear-god.net/work/my-boss-treats-me-like-a-dog/Treat your man like a dog to make him behave Metro.co.ukWriter Amy Sutherland became an overnight […]
August 1st, 2008 at 12:00 pm
To Nate’s point, I have learned a boatload from Tim Ferriss’ 4-hour Work Week.